Reister NOW!! 馬上註冊,了解更多活動內容,享用更多功能,讓你輕鬆玩轉S&B。
You have to Login for download or view attachment(s). No Account? Register
x
Edited by Rees at 10-7-2018 17:29
Since I have joined S&B for like 8 months already and that I need to clear my mind, I thought I would go on a little rant here. Throughout my life I have been asked about my sexuality, appeals of the genders to me, and how the sex is with men compared to women. Every now and then I get asked the typical question, or should I say, assumption, that I was only into women because I had been lacking some ''real actions'' in my life, which I thought, was asked out of one's arrogance and ignorance. A few days ago a close friend of mine said something hurtful which, together with all these that's happened recently i.e. the usual annual pride, the recent LGBT related court cases, did make myself take a good look at and reevaluate my mind again.
First of all, I am 100% confident and proud of my sexuality. Even more so after having tried out what sex with men is like - doesn't change my love for any gender. I don't care for being labelling if if I had to pick, I would say I am pansexual + genderqueer. Being pansexual means that I can be attracted to people regardless of their genders, but hey, not just everyone, I got my standards alright? Does it open up a lot more options than what a heterosexual has? I guess, but like I said, I don't just whore around and just like every human being that I can get my hands on, they have to have some certain appeals to me, and I am pretty picky.
''Doesn't an actual dick feel much better than a dildo?''; ''Will you look for a man as a life partner now that you know what ''real sex'' is like?'' A lot of, unsurprisingly, men asked me this, I don't know whether they are genuinely curious, or if it's a part of their way of dirty talking, or if it is purely out of self-gratification who delusionally thinks they can turn anyone straight by shoving a d_ck in them, oh yes I have met a couple of those before. The horror!
One of my closest friends actually said this to me '' You have only joined a sex club because you are unsatisfied by your sex life with your girlfriend - who doesn't have a dick''. It saddens me to see people, even people who I thought were open-minded, would say such a biased thing. What drives me into joining S&B isn't being unsatisfied with not being stuffed by a ''real dick'', it is the desire to experiment and enjoy myself with DIFFERENT people via various means. I can be in a perfectly happy heterosexual relationship but still have such needs and urges to feel and taste and f_ck other people. For me, it is not about the genders at all. Period.
As someone whose outlook and dressing style does not exactly match their assigned sex, let me tell you, I have had plenty of experiences of facing discriminations, insults, and unfair treatments from the average ''normal'' peers. Over the years, from what I have seen, I don't think the LGBTQ acceptance has really gone anywhere. It is really frustrating to see that we are still living in the past. Similarly with unpopular sex opinions, especially in a conservative place such as Hong Kong itself.
Looking back at the past events where I have exchanged thoughts with other members, it was obvious that for some, species like me are something new to them. And from being a minority amongst another group of minority called S&B, I have observed that the people here are much more accepting and truly more openminded than the general peers ''outside'', perhaps it is because they can relate to their own experiences and non-mainstream opinions regarding sex which led them to be here.
I remember the first event I went to, Mustard asked me an interesting question, it was something like will you dress differently/ sexily at the event venues in order to attract guys here, since you don't look exactly girly and visual stimulation/ physical appeals are obviously a key element to sexual arousal. I quickly dismissed the thoughts of deliberately dressing up just to please the guys because it is just so not me. But instead this place gave me a chance to explore my ''femininity'', at my own pace. Actually there is femininity in everyone and I don't think it is the appropriate word to use in this case. But in here I am comfortable with exploring that soft side of me and have a taste of what different roles feel like, which I did not know have it in me.
While writing this I realiseD how lucky I am to have found this place and somehow managed to join in. I wanna say I am really grateful for being here. If you have made it this far, thank you for bearing with me through my long and boring, slightly passive aggressive rant.
|